Saturday, April 07, 2007

A CALL SOONER THAN LATER………..


Trying desperately for my turn in the lift… gulping the last pieces forced into my mouth as breakfast…spilling half of the milk down my throat…I run to the bus stop….and every time like an idiot, I find myself early by around 10 mins….and then try to cover the color that threatens to rise on my face when I see all those familiar eyes who know this story too well.….( all those who think I never learn , including me…I must say, know me too well :P)
And just as my clock snuggles to move over two minutes past 9, I unfailingly see this unbothered soul with face having more wrinkles than the breaks in the upturn road on which his stick struggles to keep him on his quivering legs, relearning his baby steps while coming to this bus stop everyday. And everyday he approaches me and asks me in his inaudible voice …..” 910 nikal gayi kya?” everyday he waits and boards this overloaded bus through my eyes and hands and goes to a place in CP where? What for? I don’t know.
All through my bus journey this man makes me ponder at the reasons back home that forces him to take this 910 everyday unfailingly weekday or weekend with drooping eyes and wallowing speech for a job at this humble age, when most of us imagine ourselves relaxing. I yearn to ask him but I stop. I feel like providing him with an auto, tell him I can afford but again I stop myself…for I can feel in his bones his strength - his self-respect, challenging me, daring me to offer him a help, challenging all of us to dare, feel sorry for this humble man.
This man makes my eyes see the unwanted truth I am so carelessly blinded to. A boy down the road selling a pirated “A monk who sold his Ferrari”, to this girl (whose eyes lack motherly affection) herself thrown so early into a motherhood, with a baby in her hand painting a sorry picture on a red light. He makes me see a life foreign to me. A life so very unknown to me, a life of a destitute, a life of a not so fortunate.
In that 1 sec he teaches me that life isn’t easy. It’s a struggle, a constant struggle. A struggle for survival and yet making me realize how very easy is this struggle for me as compared to a million others ( as of now at least). Without the need to have to think of whether I will have food for tomorrow or a bed to sleep on he makes me see a gamut of necessities for survival I have taken for granted… making me think of all those who live for a day. Making me realize how very fortunate I am.
His eyes haunt me every time I waste the food in my plate. Every time I
sleep in a cozy bed. Every time I ride my car and every time I wallow over petty things in life, laughing at me when I crib and making me hate my self for being so selfish and for being so thankless every time I find my self in the temple with a long wish list.
He makes me aware of the harsh realities we so uninterestingly sleep over, making me have a regular trip with my conscious. Forcing me to think how crude have I become in my life. Challenging me to stick to the roots my parents had instilled in me. Forcing me to be with less fortunate every Friday and making me relearn the reasons of existence which I have left some where in this journey of mine. Making me ask myself what is peace?


P.S. – For all those who are unhappy with themselves or for what life is giving them, just take a trip down to an old age or talk to a homeless…..you would be ashamed of yourself for even being bothered by those silly trivial nutties life gave you. Though one thing that still unsettles me is to find what I have in life I have to be given a constant reminder to my brain by those who don’t have as much as me……THE BIGGEST IRONY OF LIFE ISN’T IT?

7 comments:

D said...

I wish I could bestow you with the greatest of compliments.. shower upon you the most beautiful of words.. but then none of it wud be ever enough to express what i feel right now.. bravo.. keep writing.. your blog lives upto its name..

paras said...

This post can touch anyone's heart..you sure would make more idiots like me appreciate what they have got from life :)

Ashish Mathur said...

speechless...

SRISHTI GUPTA said...

This is the first time i read your blog, alwaz tried to read, never got an opportunity.. now wanna say that y i was not given an opportunity to read it earlier..

today i feel im blessed with few moments that make u realize "who u r" and "wat's ur aim in life" and v r fortunate that v r given so many comforts in life and for that v shud be thankful to god...

keep writing gud luck..wud love to read something new soon..

hitesh shakya said...

huhh
post isnt gonna touch nebodys heart
wht the hell i hv to do with whts been given to an old age or a homeless
hes got wht he deserves
n im gonna get wht i deserve :p

Grandson said...

Hi Pallavi,

I am happy that among the selected posts that I read on your blog today (I am here for the first time)... I read this one. Kudos to U... But honey I just wish to add a couple of things.. Its true we all need to be grateful to The Lord Almighty for all that he has given us... But that in itself is an opportunity for us to Celebrate the Grand festival called life with ppl as lucky & especially not so lucky like us (Gives us an opportunity to do that much more)...

Secondly, never feel guilty for asking more from Him... After all U share that special relation with Him .. Dont U?? Instead the next time you visit Him in the temple... Ask Him God, I need plenty more... for myself & the strength to work for others who need me.... I know He listens to gud souls like U....

May God be your Best Buddy...

I shall pray for your friend at the Bus stop....

Keshav

Pallavi said...

hmm
well i guess you are right but then dont u think if god listenes to my prayers more than therz i should rather ask for a direct path between the two of them and not be the medium so that even they start believing or continue to believe in him inspite of the continuous challenges life offers them!